Expensive Abby: Dishonest husband and father of two disabled grownup kids sends financial savings to his girlfriends

DEAR ABBY: A 12 months in the past, I came upon that my husband had been dishonest on me with a number of girls for over a decade and had saved two of his conquests in verify all through that point. He additionally despatched all our financial savings to his girlfriends in a foreign country. As a result of we now have two disabled grownup kids and one neurotypical grownup little one, I made a decision to remain within the marriage.

A 12 months later, I am nonetheless struggling. Actually, I really feel dangerous. I can barely sleep and have extreme nervousness. I’ve nobody to speak to about this as a result of I really feel embarrassed and humiliated by what he did to our household. To guard my kids, as a result of they’d undergo needlessly in the event that they came upon about his infidelity, I placed on a façade and pretended all the things was wonderful.

I am determined for sleep, however all I do is cry and wander round my home at night time. My husband places all of the blame on me, making me really feel so betrayed and harm that I do not know what to do. What steps ought to I take to place this behind me and transfer ahead with out having to replay it in my head on a regular basis? – He shook the world in California

Expensive Rocky World: Your first step needs to be to speak to your physician about what is going on on, after which ask for a referral to a licensed psychological well being skilled. It is necessary to have somebody to speak to as a result of staying silent makes you sick.

Telling the reality won’t mirror poorly on you. Your kids don’t have anything to achieve by staying at midnight. When your husband emptied your checking account, he was hurting him financially in addition to you. As soon as you’re emotionally stronger, seek the advice of a lawyer and take your cues from that individual on shield your self and your kids.

***

Expensive Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also called Jane Phillips, and based by her mom, Pauline Phillips. Name Expensive Abby on www.DearAbby.com Or PO Field 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.